ChamaH Soch - Glory

[general_chang]

This month is the Klingon month Soo'jen or 'Glory'. It is perhaps fitting that I should meet my other self in such a month. He did glory to his people and those who he encountered upon those ship.

Each attempt to strip his Klingon honour away from him was repelled and he found honour in resistance. Honour here, I find, is thin on the ground. There are few enemies to fight, beyond those childish to believe that a tantrum against our Exalted Admiral will gain them points or fear is a valued weapon where amnesia is common and ennui more so.

Death has no meaning. And I mean not in the human sense of the meaning of death, yes, I see the oblivion as much as a human or Vulcan or Time Lord would, but it is a mere shutdown, not unlike what an AI might experience should you deactivate it, but that is not meaning.

It is so limited. It pays no respect to the life led before it, reducing it to mere automatic functions to be reset if it 'malfunctions'.

I have never felt the desire to simply vanish before I arrived in this place.

In that other ship, there were enemies. True injustices to be fought, honour existed in the hearts of those inmates, it made them strong, powerful. Vital. Each of their deaths had meaning. Each smile, each act of generosity, had meaning.

I share my former warden's enthusiasm [Enthusiasm, blood lust, same difference, right?] to return, if only to restore meaning to my own existence, regardless of the death stolen from me.

It has given me a purpose.

[Filtered away from Sexby]

I do not expect understanding on this matter. I can only say that a soldier forms an attachment to his weapon, it is part of his identity, to hold a weapon, to defend with it, to make it an extension of self. Sentimental perhaps, but nonetheless a strong feeling.

We all know of Sexby, of his crimes, but of the man beyond them. Perhaps this version is a unpolished man, one given to baser instincts but we know him, even if this youth has not known us.

I have thus deemed him suitable to bear a blade. I am no warden, but I am a general. A warrior does not wield a weapon carelessly, particularly in a place unknown to him. Do not remove it. I warn you only as a courtesy.

Comments

Private

[lostundercover]

It means you're being stupid in this situation.

Private

[general-chang.livejournal.com]

I'm informing the barge of a potential situation, if a member of the barge decides to engage him, they'll understand what faces them. If they chose to disregard it, it is their own choice and, should they become harmed, their foolishness if they do so.

Private

[lostundercover]

You're informing the Barge of a situation you created that's dangerous.

Private

[general-chang.livejournal.com]

I 'created' nothing. He is no more or no less dangerous with the weapon than he is without. He is a soldier, a man tried to follow orders and to kill, a man who has lived in war. He does not need a mere blade to accomplish this, but his mind and his skill.

Private

[lostundercover]

But a blade makes it a whole lot fuckin' easier.

Private

[general-chang.livejournal.com]

It does not, not to a man trained.

Private

[lostundercover]

Listen, asshole. I'm a man trained and I could do a shitload of damage if I'm trying, but that doesn't mean a knife doesn't make it easier and more appealing. I know what you are. I get why you gave it to him and if I thought we could trust him at all, I'd agree with you. But he might not be the guy you think he is and fuck you if he hurts anyone or it gets out of hand.

Private

[general-chang.livejournal.com]

You clearly have no idea 'what' I am, human, do not presume.

Private

[lostundercover]

You said he's like you, so I can assume a little.

Private

[general-chang.livejournal.com]

However much you believe you understand, you are human and I am Klingon, the difference is so large that you could not begin to comprehend it.

I have been forced by this ship to endure humanity time and again, so I understand you far more than you could ever hope to me. It is not an understanding I wish for, but I have it.

Private

[lostundercover]

I'm not trying to comprehend shit except how you had a knife already and why you gave it to someone who can use it to the most damage before he showed he could be trusted with it. I don't give a fuck what you are or how well you think you know me.

Fuck, I hope you're not graduating any time soon.

Private

[general-chang.livejournal.com]

Then don't say what I am nor decide what I should do, you are an inmate and even if I were interested in your weak, human morality, I would not rely upon one who failed to hold to even that. I have explained my motives, if it is beyond you still, go bother someone else.

Private

[lostundercover]

You can use whatever excuses you want to avoid the issue, but it still fuckin' stands. You're retarded, you made a mistake, and I hope it comes back to fuck you.

Private

[general-chang.livejournal.com]

I made no mistake, I do not regret what I have done, nor will I.

Private

[lostundercover]

I wasn't asking.

Private

[general-chang.livejournal.com]

No, you were just wrong. Ascribing to me human morality. They weren't excuses, they were the values I was brought up with, which you ignore and which this barge reviles. If graduation means the removal of these values, I will fight it until eternity.

Private-

[lostundercover]

It's not a matter of morality. It's fucking common sense. If you were really brought up to hand out weapons to the first unstable soldier you see? Then yeah, it's wrong here. Maybe not where you come from, but here.

Private-

[general-chang.livejournal.com]

Your changing of the facts will not impress anyone.

I continue to not care about what humans consider 'right', seeing as I'm forced to put up with oppression of my ideals and experiences each and every moment I live here, forced to not only be away from my planet but any member of my species or those who could possibly understand that.

Private-

[lostundercover]

I didn't change any facts.

If I don't understand it, then stop fuckin' talkin' about it. Your ranting isn't helping any.

Private

[general-chang.livejournal.com]

'First unstable soldier I see' is incorrect.

If you don't understand it, then don't presume the right to question it.

Private

[lostundercover]

It was an exaggeration, asshole.

Your culture isn't the culture here. Sexby is human, not whatever the fuck you are. I get him better than you do. Doesn't matter if I know shit about you or not, I know what you did was stupid and someone's going to get hurt because of it.

Private

[general-chang.livejournal.com]

It does not prevent it being untrue. An exaggeration alters the truth.

People will only get hurt if they challenge him. If they challenged them before they still would have gotten hurt, whether it was a knife or not, damage can be done. And you, are buried under twenty first century morality, he was born in the seventeenth, two wholly different eras.

Private

[lostundercover]

Sure, fine. You're still wrong.

And you're from some fuckin' future century and not even human. If you really want to argue understandings, you're doin' a fuckin' terrible job defendin' youah cohneh.

Private

[general-chang.livejournal.com]

No, you are.

I've been human, you have not been Klingon. And I have known this man, you, however, don't know him, you assume your way is the right one despite coming from a position of complete ignorance. It is in assuming you know what is right for a man you don't know where you are wrong.

Private

[lostundercover]

Still a completely different era, guy. I knew him. This guy is different and I don't assume he's the same fuckin' guy.